True story. We’re fishing out on the Gulf, moving at a serious clip out to a honey hole only discoverable by the perfect harmony of man and computer. It’s cheating, but better than coming home empty handed and hearing about it. On our way out, I see a red balloon on the surface. I joke to my brother that any second a sea turtle is going to choke to death. Turns out, by the end of the joke, the head of a sea turtle, big as a basketball is cutting a straight line to the balloon. Unfortunately, we were traveling at such a clip that I couldn’t have jumped in if I had wanted to, and by the time we got the message to my buddy driving the boat, the balloon and turtle had both blended into the horizon.

When I tell the story, everyone assumes the turtle choked to death. Of course, it did. But the look on the turtle’s face. Joy. Luxury. How else do these moments end?